Wednesday, 20 March 2013

New Coat New Breasts

The blog has been a little slow as I have been slightly distracted since February.
I grew what can only be described as a bacon medallion under the skin of the left breasticle.
Wasn't too worried at first as something smaller had happened last year and a mammogram said it was probably hormonal and sure enough it disappeared within a cycle.

Didn't panic but happened to be in the Gp's following week and she thought it might be dermal and not to worry.
Then a Sunday later the thickness had gone and the redness was there like a bruise.
It's dermal isn't it so I am not worried
I'll get some hydrocortisone cream from the chemist.
I will just look up breast discoloration on the internet.
Inflammatory Breast Cancer.
No this isn't what I want I want cream.......keep searching........
This looks exactly like what I've got.

And that was it, I lost it.

The following day at the GP she said mmmmmmmm never heard of that I think it is probably a low grade infection like Mastitis but I will refer you up to the Breast Care Center anyway and take the internet information that you have.
I did take an antibiotic which actually cleared up my sinus problem in a jiffy

Fine not worried.

Met the Nurse for tea at mine who said why don't you have private appt. and find out whats what and then you will know for sure.
I'm fine I will wait for the referral
Well within in 10 minutes I'd booked an appt. for the same afternoon.
£235 for 15 minutes with the one of the best in the world and I'd seen him last year following that last mammogram.
Gareth agreed to pay because he was struggling with ideas for a birthday present although this was a bit over budget.

The Mr took a good look, nope nothing to worry about, has seen Inflammatory Breast Cancer and this wasn't it. He didn't even dither or question it 1%.
Probably a low grade infection.
Brilliant left happy.

Not happy by the time I got home, Mastitis and Inflammatory Breast Cancer present the same so the seed of doubt was growing uncontrollably in to a Triffid and I felt so ashamed to think this after having seen the Mr with the big qualification.
The Consultant Radiologist I saw the following day, who looked like she knew Stella McCartney and wore a ring with a rock that you could see from the moon agreed that I was right to be worried as the symptoms were very similar.
She said that Inflammatory Breast Cancer is really rare and inflammation is not.
Inflammatory Breast Cancer is really ugly and aggressive and my breast didn't look like that.
There was nothing she could see and nothing was going to happen between now and the Breast Centrer appt so I should wait and see if there was any change and push for a biopsy at that appt.

She was right and three days of Beta Blockers and some exhaustion I finally calmed down and managed to put it to the back of my mind.


This arrived

G bought me a beautiful duffel coat for Christmas but it is really for the very cold weather and I needed something for Autumn and Spring when a cardigan just isn't enough. Auntie Pol has the perfect coat in biscuit and no matter how many times I go into Zara I just can't replicate it.
And it needed to be timeless and without fashion fuss because it is going to see the school gate for some years to come.
I bought this in the sale with a whopping £240 off.
Never had so many compliments in my life.
Only problem is, it doesn't have that light weight coverage I was after.
It's like wearing a cashmere blanket.
As these teeny tiny pictures show.

I love it, it's not what I was after but it is never going back.
You could ski in this it is so warm.

So the boob appt came back and as they are busy they held a clinic on a Saturday.
Three hours of history, THOROUGH examination, mammogram, ultra sound and a chat. I got my punch biopsy that wouldn't stop bleeding through the dressing and that's when I felt light headed and really cried.
But stopped when someone came in and said that I wasn't going to die.

The Consultant Nurse Specialist was so lovely and confident that it was my hormones said she didn't need to see me and that I would recieve a letter in about three weeks.

I was exhausted and really sad.
I am about to head into my forties and I have spent my thirties worrying about my health and it is worse now that I have the girls. I had made a decision to spend this year getting fit for forty and ditching these anxieties because it is so tiring for everyone Dr. included.
I was looking forward to 39 and turning a new page but this was just hanging over me and no matter how many said it's your hormones until that result crawled out of the lab I wasn't going to be satisfied.

Today in the fifth week the letter finally arrived.

I am pleased to say that the biopsy results only showed normal skin and underlying muscle with no sinister features.
Everybody present at the Multidisciplinary Meeting was happy with this outcome and hence, apart from you being breast aware there is no need for us to do anything else.

Well how lovely is that. Thank you.

This weekend I got a thick cold in the nose, couldn't breath in or out.
By Tuesday my eyes had changed shape I thought my thyroid had blown.
Turns out just a bit of viral conjunctivitis that has now gone.
What can you do!
Moorfields can stand down.

Now I am ready to be happy at 39.

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